Feeling Terrible!

This picture describes how I felt yesterday.

It has now been a week since my last Lamictal reduction (to ~204mg), and yesterday I tried reducing my dose again.  Big mistake!  My symptoms were pretty bad: tiredness, muscle aches, dry mouth, metallic taste in mouth, headache, sensitivity to light and sound, confusion, bobble-head effect...There's probably a couple I'm missing.  The bobble-head effect is new.  I didn't even notice I was doing it, but a coworker pointed it out to me.  I couldn't think clearly and a couple of things I said came out weird.  (I can't really explain that; sometimes my words get jumbled, or I just completely trail off.  The talking thing is practically "normal" for me, as is the confusion, because they have been going on ever since I started taking Lamictal about 4 years ago.  It's sad when you think of that as normal behavior for yourself.)  My boss sent me home and I slept fitfully for the rest of the day.

Too bad I didn't look as cute as this little guy...

To help with the side effects, I'm taking 20 QuietMinds capsules per day, instead of the recommended 16; and 2 GABA tablets.  It seems like it might have helped because I'm feeling much better today.  So, I will wait another week before reducing my dose again.

I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS NOT MEANT TO REPLACE THE GUIDANCE OF YOUR HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL.

Today I'm having violent thoughts and I'm in a daze.  I don't like it.  I've been sleeping at least 12 hours a day for the past 3 days.  I've decided to take extra QuietMinds.

Lamictal ~204mg, Wellbutrin 200mg, Celexa 10mg

Pharmaceutical Companies Lie

As a former psychology student, I am especially distressed about the lies being taught to future psychiatrists (and other doctors) about pharmaceutical drugs.  Some of the information dispensed by the drug companies are not outright lies; but misrepresentation of the facts causes just as much harm.

The first video simply points out the tricky wording that is used to describe certain prescription drugs.  Think about what the pharmaceutical companies are really saying about their own drugs.  That verbiage was carefully chosen to sound more technical and less ambivalent than it actually is.

The second video discusses the "conspiracy theory" that the FDA and the pharmaceutical companies are working together to maximize profit, regardless of the detriment to patients' health.  In a capitalistic economy, what company doesn't want to work with other companies to maximize profits?  It irks me how the woman in the video attacks the man's character by saying he is biased, rather than offering a useful argument for her position on the matter.  

I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS NOT MEANT TO REPLACE THE GUIDANCE OF YOUR HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL.

Down to ~200mg of Lamictal

As I mentioned before, I've been tapering off Lamictal 1/16th (~19mg) of my original dose every 2 weeks or so.  Now, this number is not 100% accurate, since I've been using a pill-cutter to haphazardly slice the pills into small bits.  I haven't been to my psychiatrist for about 3 months, and my tapering plan is not approved by a physician.  *If you are tapering off any drug--pharmaceutical or otherwise--I highly recommend guidance from a physician!*  The only reason I'm not relying on my doctor is that I go to the county mental health clinic, where they have bounced me between several doctors over the past year.  I feel that my doctor is unequipped to sufficiently help me, so I've done extensive research on withdrawing from the specific drugs that I am prescribed.  Also, I've had previous experience with Vicodin and Xanax withdrawals.

YAY ME!!!  I'm down about 100mg from my original dose!  That means I'm one-third of the way done--this is cause for celebration!!!

Back to business--here are the side effects I have been experiencing since my last reduction:

• Moodiness and agitation
• Sleeplessness
• Tinnitus
• Sugar/carb cravings
• Confusion

Not too bad!  The migraines, extreme agitation, and anxiety are not bothering me this time.  (I think it's because of the QuietMinds supplement I've been taking.  Source Naturals' GABA Calm helps, too.)  Sleeplessness is an especially bad side effect to have because I believe it intensifies all the other side effects.  To combat this I've been taking 3mg-6mg of Melatonin before bed, which I highly recommend for anyone who has trouble falling asleep.

Are you tapering off Lamictal?  Do you have any comments to add?

I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS NOT MEANT TO REPLACE THE GUIDANCE OF YOUR HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL.

My Lamictal Tapering Plan

In a previous blog post, Introduction, I discussed my first painful attempt at tapering off Lamictal.  Tapering off a drug is the process of reducing your dose in small increments over an extended period of time, which can help reduce withdrawal symptoms.  This is in contrast to "going cold turkey," or stopping abruptly.  For many years, pharmaceutical companies (namely GlaxoSmithKline) vehemently denied that abruptly discontinuing antidepressants caused any side effects.  Because of this, doctors did not warn their patients and many patients became indefinitely dependent on their meds.  Facing glaring evidence and numerous complaints from patients, GlaxoSmithKline was forced to admit that there were side effects to stopping their drugs, which they chose to term "antidepressant discontinuation syndrome," better known as "drug withdrawals."

Lamictal is not actually an antidepressant, but and anticonvulsant which is commonly prescribed to people diagnosed with bipolar disorder.  I was not warned of any so-called discontinuation syndrome associated with Lamictal, but as a recovering drug addict I was familiar with intense withdrawals.  Anything you put into your body has the potential to affect how you feel physically and emotionally.  Don't let anyone tell you differently.

I've dealt with Xanax withdrawals; I've weathered painkiller withdrawals--and let me tell you, Lamictal withdrawals are just as bad and maybe worse.  The effects last longer, too.  The first time I tapered, I went down a quarter dose every week, starting at my prescribed dose of 300mg.  The first week was ok, but by the second week I was having migraines, body aches, disorientation, ringing in my ears, intense mood swings, uncharacteristic irritability, memory loss and a dream-like feeling of being disconnected from my body.  I told myself to stop being such a wussy, I would live!  But after a month I just couldn't take it anymore; I was no longer able to get out of bed.  So I desperately grabbed my pill bottle and swallowed 300mg.  A few hours later I was feeling so much better, and a week later I was back to normal.

This episode did not make me give up.  I did a bunch of research and decided to cut up my pills into the tiniest pieces possible, which came out to ~18.75mg.  (I am prescribed two 150mg pills per day, and the smallest I could cut them were into eighths.)  I have been going down ~18.75mg (one sixteenth of my dose) about every two weeks and I am still having withdrawal symptoms, but I am functional most days.  Right now I'm at 225mg--it's going so slowly, but I wish I could do only 10mg at a time.


I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS NOT MEANT TO REPLACE GUIDANCE FROM YOUR HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL.

What is Lamictal?

Nobody really knows how or why it works...

According to the WebMD website:
"Lamotrigine (the generic name for Lamictal)  is used alone or with other medications to prevent and control seizures. It may also be used to help prevent the extreme mood swings of bipolar disorder in adults.  Lamotrigine is known as an anticonvulsant or antiepileptic drug. It is thought to work by restoring the balance of certain natural substances in the brain."

GlaxoSmithKline info: http://us.gsk.com/products/assets/us_lamictal.pdf

The abrupt discontinuation of Lamictal causes INTENSE withdrawal symptoms including: headaches, confusion/disorientation, agitation, sleepiness, mania, periods of memory loss, and all kinds of other horrible stuff.  I am tapering off at ~20mg every 2 weeks and it is still very difficult.  You have been warned!

I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS NOT MEANT TO REPLACE THE GUIDANCE OF YOUR HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL.

INTRODUCTION

Hello there; nice to meet you.

I began taking psychiatric meds in the Spring of 2008 at the age of 20.  I was suicidal, probably because I was abusing pills and alcohol.  I was officially diagnosed with "mood disorder, not otherwise specified" and had to deal with social anxiety issues as well.  I continued regular and escalating substance abuse until August 2009, when I tried to kill myself and really seriously almost died.  When I woke up in the hospital, I had an epiphany--I knew I was being given a second chance by God and that I had more to accomplish before I left this life.

Fast-forward to Spring 2013...I finally have a job that pays all my bills, I'm stable, and I leave my crazy boyfriend.  I'm kind of starting over and I decide to get off my meds because I no longer think I need them, I read about the long-term health effects, and become interested in natural therapies, supplements, and healthy eating.

I first tried to stop taking Lamictal in July without help from my doctor.  (I lost my insurance over a year ago, so I went to county health where they bounced me between several doctors, none of whom have taken the time to get to know me.)  Knowing that all drugs have withdrawal effects, I cut up my pills and reduced from 300mg of Lamictal to 0mg over the period of a month.  HORRIBLE!!!  I thought I was going crazy, and it took a good friend's Google search for me to find out that I was having intense and debilitating withdrawal effects.  To further prove it was indeed withdrawal, just a few hours after taking my normal dose I was feeling WAY BETTER.  I knew I needed a better plan...

I AM NOT A DOCTOR.  THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS NOT MEANT TO REPLACE THE GUIDANCE OF YOUR HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL.